INTERVIEW | Flowside
23rd October 2020 | 12:04 PM
Author: Sabrina Ullmann
(Flowside Founder)

Netflix and chill - or not?

Flowside in an interview with Silva Schwabe, expert for hypnosis, relaxation techniques and holistic life coaching.

Flowside in an interview with Silva Schwabe, expert for hypnosis, relaxation techniques and holistic life coaching.

The phrase “Netflix and chill” has established itself in linguistic usage and even made it into the Urban Dictionary as a description for coitus. But some couples and experts report that Netflix is increasingly becoming a sex killer. Silva Schwabe provides insights and experiences from real life.

From the video store to instant romance

Netflix started in 1997 as a video rental company and digitalized its business model a few years later. Due to the platform’s immense popularity, the term “Netflix and chill” was also established in both English and German language. Meanwhile, the phrase can even be found in the Urban Dictionary. In the beginning, the expression was to be understood literally: Watching a film or series while hanging out on the couch and relaxing – an activity that can be done quite well on your own.

With Smart Home and the introduction of the all-round button, which starts Netflix, turns down the lights, switches the phone to silent mode and orders a nice menu from the delivery service, the phrase “Netflix and chill” is used as an alternative paraphrase for:

Would you like to come up for a drink?

The phenomenon has also been taken up by the media. In 2015, the Süddeutsche wrote: “The predictable, repetitive offerings of public broadcasters do not exactly have a stimulating effect. And what would come out as a comparable term? ‘Tatort und Kuscheln’ (A popular German crime show and cuddling) or ‘Sportschau und abhängen’ (Sports and hanging out) as a code word for – yes, for what? Sex by appointment, every Saturday and Sunday at the same time? (Süddeutsche on 30.09.2015).

Probably works for some people. On the Internet, you can also find corresponding parodies – among them, a guide with eight positions for the “Netflix and chill” night, for example, including making space for the obligatory popcorn bowl.

Netflix Evolutionary Step 3: "The Anti-Sex Program"

But what happened? After about one to two years, the average consumer has usually gone through all the good content, and the search for a suitable evening program suddenly becomes anything but “chill”. In addition: Once you have finally decided on a title and invested a lot of time and effort in the search, the sense of duty to follow the film attentively tends to be higher. The TV doesn’t just run on the side like with free TV, while you’re tidying up, or preparing food. Some couples and experts even report that Netflix is increasingly becoming a sex killer.

What are your practical experiences with this problem?

Silva Schwabe: “I have several men and women in my practice who describe exactly this problem. Netflix has a greater pulling effect than video nights ever had. It has become a real addiction to watch Netflix series so as not to miss anything. Sexuality is completely put on the sideline. It’s much more important to know how the series continues, so that you can discuss the latest episodes with your colleagues during coffee break – true to the motto: “IN is who’s in!”

How do the clients find you?

Silva Schwabe: “Advertising with sexuality is difficult. I use channels like Facebook,
Instagram and Google Business to draw attention to this important topic”.

What problems do your clients come to you with?

Silva Schwabe: “Mostly because of dormant sexuality, but also with erection or orgasm disorders. The alienation of couples also plays a significant role. In our professional and private lives, we are often asked a lot of things. People long for relaxation, want to be able to switch off, without having to pay too much attention.

They don't always want to be active, but want to be "entertained".

This is where the danger for limited willingness to have sex lies. Sex means to be active, to get involved with your partner with all senses, mutual give and take. For most people this is already too much action, and they prefer the relaxed Netflix evening.

What is your advice for all sexually disinterested Netflix people?

Silva Schwabe: “My advice would be to be aware of what it means for the relationship when sexuality falls asleep completely. In a relationship, the joint development and fulfillment of sexual desires is just as important as advancing in one’s career. Sometimes a calendar in which one writes a heart for a little adventure with his or her partner helps.

Why not try something new to make sex exciting? And very important: take time to talk about your own wishes and feelings, and show your partner appreciation.

Thanks so much for the insight, Silva! And for all the Netflix chillers out there:

Winter is coming - so be prepared 😉

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Silva Schwabe

Expert for hypnosis, relaxation techniques and holistic life consulting in Munich and Ingolstadt.

Learn more?

You are interested in further tips and always wanted to know if hypnosis works for you? Just write us a message with the keyword “hypnosis” until 8.11.2020. Among all participants we raffle a relaxation hypnosis with Silva Schwabe.

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Publish with us!

We offer a stage for authentic stories from inspiring explorers. No matter if you are a digital nomad, an entrepreneur, a social organization, a speaker, coach, journalist, professor, comedian, musician or artist, or just want to leave a positive influence – write us a message, grab a coffee and let’s talk about your project.